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Inside Out

Love isn’t always patient 

Jeanne Sager
Posted 9/28/21

Over the years, I’ve shot hundreds of weddings. First weddings. Second weddings. I even shot a fourth wedding once. And every single time, I marvel at the willingness of two people to come …

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Inside Out

Love isn’t always patient 

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Over the years, I’ve shot hundreds of weddings. First weddings. Second weddings. I even shot a fourth wedding once. And every single time, I marvel at the willingness of two people to come together and give love a chance. At my own wedding, the Corinthians passage read out at millions of weddings was recited. Love is patient. Love is kind. It does not envy. It does not boast. I won’t keep going — if you’ve been to even one wedding in your lifetime, you’ve probably heard it. But as I look to celebrate my 21st wedding anniversary this week, I realize it’s both completely untrue and true at the same time. Love isn’t always patient. Love isn’t always kind. Sometimes love is exactly what makes us envious and what makes us boastful too. At 21 years, we’re still early in the marriage game. I was lucky enough to be there when my grandparents celebrated their 50th, and in their relationship I saw the sort of give and take and respect I’ve realized makes my own marriage work. At less than halfway to that mark, please forgive me if I sound naive about how it all works. Then again, I’ve shot hundreds of weddings — and not just first ones but seconds and fourths. What I see love as isn’t infinitely patient or always kind, although sometimes it is. The love I see on altars and in front of town justices, the love I see when someone who’s been married three times decides to give it another go, the love I practice every single day in my home? That love is hopeful. It sees the good in tomorrow and the day after that and the day after that. It’s willing to take the rough days because they’re part of life, and because there will always be good days too. Always.

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